The Happy Family

 “We never see each other!” “She is always on the computer!” “He is always texting!” “We are ships passing in the night.”

If these are some of the things that you have been saying lately chances are you are not typically a happy family. Now that’s not to say that you don’t love each other. But “just getting” by or “getting along” isn’t enough to be happy.

While reading WebMD, I found an article outlining 15 Secrets to Have a Happy Family. I will not do a full review of the article but I am going to share some of the “secrets” that I thought would be helpful.

You are family!

• Enjoy One Another: You are family! You should be happy to see your children or your spouse or your siblings. Appreciate the fact that you have a family. There are some people who have only themselves.
• Stop Being Busy: If your calendar is loaded with yoga classes, hair appointments, women’s meetings, golf outings, karate class, ballet class, etc., that’s too much. Limit your after school and after work activities to one per day. Schedule your “me time” when the kids are in class or your spouse is at work. Start collaborating and sharing activities such as exercising and do them together.
• Communicate: Everyone in the family should feel comfortable to talk freely amongst each other. If a child has a concern or anxiety, they should be able to talk to their family FIRST without any hesitation.

For the entire article please CLICK HERE. This will not solve all of your familial problems, but it is definitely a start to having a happy family. Comment below and let me know what you think!

How to Fix My Relationship

I always have conversations with people that start off with the question: Where did it all go wrong? Their marriage or courtship has gotten to the point of discontent and they want to know how to fix their relationship.  In the beginning of most relationships you are in the infatuation stage. You call and/or text each other all of the time. You go out to dinner or hang out with friends at least 3 nights a week. You laugh, joke, tickle, and giggle with one another.

Then there is a pivotal moment or occasion that sends the relationship into an entirely different direction.

For most couples these occasions consist of one or more of the following:

• A union- marriage, birth of a child, even a new pet, etc.
• A loss- death of a family member, friend, colleague, or pet.
• A change- finances, career, early, mid, late-life-crisis

There are definitely more life changing scenarios that can alter a relationship, but these tend to be the most common ones. Any of the above can alter your perspective on life, the way that you think and/or feel. Thus changing how you operate in your relationship. Do you want to know how I know? It’s because I have been there. I have a son, who is one years old and he is my LIFE! However, before I had my son I was a social butterfly and partied all of the time. I was super fun to be around. So by default, I was a fun girlfriend. Since being a mother I have not been fun at all. I may have my moments of goofiness here and there but that is about it. I was not fun anymore and it took a toll on my relationship.

So how do I fix my relationship for good?

Fix Yourself

This is the hardest yet most crucial step in this journey.  It is difficult to look into your inner mirror and say, “I don’t know who I am anymore” or “Where is the real me?”.  The easiest way to begin your self- evaluation is through journaling. Write down how and why you feel the way that you do. Jot down 10 things that you love about yourself and focus on letting those things shine over the things that you don’t particularly care for.

Communicate Better

Maybe you don’t need to be “fixed”.  It could be your spouse or partner who needs more alterations. If that is the case then communication is KEY. Every couple needs to master the art of communication. Identify what makes your significant other happy, sad, furious, giddy, etc. What are the trigger words that can send your partner crying, screaming, or smiling? Once you learn how to communicate with one another effectively is will change how you perceive one another.

Do Unto Others

It sounds like such a cliché, doesn’t it? But it really is that simple. Treat your loved one the way that you want to be treated. If you keep their happiness in the forefront of your mind, you will become more aware of their feelings towards you and what you do and say. The same applies to them as well.

Fixing a relationship takes consistency, persistence, and determination.

This isn’t meant to be a fly by night, love overnight remedy. But it’s worth it. If you follow these steps, over time you will discover a new vigor in your relationship and start re-living those courtship days when it was all smiles, giggles, and laughs…well at least a majority of the time. Hey, you have to start somewhere!

Order, Order, Order!!!

Good Morning Everyone!!

I hope everyone had a great weekend! Mine was filled with reflection, analyzing and planning. Since I have the moniker,  The Life Architect, I should practice what I preach right? My main message is Design Your Life…Build Your Future. This is what I help people to do, all day every day. But I have a confession…I haven’t been following my own advice and message (yikes!). I have allowed life’s turns and twists sway me back and forth in different directions. It’s even evident in my blog posts! August and September has been a little hay wire, but I recognized it and now I am taking action and living a Designed Life. Now don’t get worried I will not be boring or unlike myself, I will simply have more structure. And structure is good!

For those of you who do not know, I am an entrepreneur, mother, life coach, social media strategist, etc. It seems like a lot but it only becomes overwhelming when I don’t have a system. I want to continue to provide all of you with quality content, so to do that my blog will be as follow:

• Mondays-Marketing/Business/Entrepreneurship
• Tuesdays-Relationships
• Wednesdays-Spirituality
• Thursdays-Health and Wellness
• Fridays-Personal Development
• Saturdays-Social Media
• Sundays-The Art of Blogging

I look forward to sharing my experience, expertise, and thoughts in all of these areas! I will be setting up an email list so that we can stay connected. I will be launching my website soon and I want you all to be apart of it!!

Design Your Life…Build Your Future!

3 Steps To Your Best Life

We are all striving for a better life in whatever way we know how, but there are 3 critical steps in attaining your best life that don’t take rocket science.

As I reflect on the memory of 9/11, I become overwhelmed with gratitude and a renewed vigor for life. Sometimes we concentrate on all of things that are not perfect in life that we lose focus on all of the good things that are present in our life. It is in this state of reflection that can be the jump off point for us to take real action steps toward the life that has been calling all of us.

No matter where you are currently, most of us would say that there is room for improvement either financially, physically or spiritually. The following 3 steps will provide a system of attainment that will assist you in uncovering your best life:

3 Steps To Your Best Life:

1. Identify and Define:Start a journal or utilize a journaling app and focus on these 5 areas of your life:

• Finances/Money
• Business/Career
• Friends/Family
• Mindset/Health
• Giving Back To The World                                                                                                                                                                      ***Feel free to add other areas as you see fit.***

COMPLETE FOR EACH AREA:

In the first section: Write down a vision of what you want in that particular area (ex. Mindset/Health: Identify = I want to be physically fit. Define = 100 sit ups per day)

In the second section: Write down signs of your life right now in the present that prove to you that your goal is going to come to you easily. (Ex: I was born into a healthy body, and I am capable of exercising. I can currently do 10 sit ups) – Feel free to come back and add to this list until you reach your goal of 100 sit ups.

This is in alignment with the concept of acknowledging where you are and making a connection with your vision of the future.

2. Gratitude

• Think about and write down 5 things in your personal life that you are grateful for in last 24 hours.

• Think about and write down 5 things in your business/professional life that you are grateful for in the last 24 hours.

3. Recognize the Negative Stories That You Tell Yourself and Get Rid of Them!

(ex. “You have to suffer for success”, “Money is evil”, “You have to have money in order to make money”, etc.)

We all have “stories” that we tell ourselves that subconsciously rule our decisions. That explains why we fail to do what we know intellectually is good for us. We often live our lives in a pattern, but most of us don’t recognize the pattern. The moment you begin to notice your pattern is the moment of clarity that brings forth further awakening and your evolution.

If you are ready to follow these 3 steps to your best life and develop your business and your life into what you desire… CLICK HERE

What Does It Mean To THRIVE?

to grow vigorously
to gain in wealth or possessions, prosper
to progress toward or realize a goal despite or because of circumstances

I read somewhere that September is the month of the harvest. Sounds exciting huh? The truth of the matter is if you have been sowing seeds of business, information, spirituality, kindness, etc., then this is your month! I like to think that I have been in the sowing stage for quite sometime. It is a difficult stage to endure. Many of you are probably just like me: you have invested money into your business, time into your relationship and effort into being a better person. Then what happens? You wait for sprouts of hope to manifest themselves and produce an abundance of change. This whole process is pretty profound but what’s next is even more amazing!

Get Ready To THRIVE

Because you were in a state of cultivating there are many things that go on behind the scenes that most are not aware of. Those around us may not see the efforts of our toil. Sometimes even we may not be aware of what is truly going on and how much impact we are on the verge of making.

When you thrive, you will experience an abundance of success in all facets of your life. It is important to stay grounded and focused during this time period. You want your “harvest” to be a calculated effort and you want to make sure you do not waste any of what you have reaped.

Today’s Mission:
Identify what it is that you need in order to THRIVE. Document it in your journal. Later we will explore how to achieve those necessary components.

Just Take The First Step

I want to…but I am scared.

New beginnings and journeys can be frightening and sometimes overwhelming but it’s important to simply take the first step. But life has a way of forcing you to go into the direction of your destiny. Once you submit to your destiny, you can now make the universe bend in your favor.

We all have been systematically programmed since we were children: Go to school, come home, go to sleep, wake up and repeat. As we get older, we replace school with work and then repeat the same mundane routine, over and over again. Where is the living in that? Why do we have to squeeze time in to do the things that we enjoy and love because so much of our time is devoted to the programmed routine?

The Shift

Once, maybe twice in a lifetime we will take part in the crossroad experience. This is an event in which we know if we go in one direction or the other our lives will never be the same. I personally experienced this about 8 years ago. I was battling with a prescription pain medicine addiction and one day I saw my life flash before my eyes. I saw myself strung out on something much worse and I was unrecognizable. I knew that from that vision I had to take immediate action and move back home with my parents and I did. It was difficult because I had a life of my own and I was independent but I was slowly killing myself. I had the ultimate shift. Had I not made that decision, my life would be completely different or better yet non-existent. Maybe you have not had to battle addiction but are stuck in a purposeless job, unfulfilled relationship, etc., and you need to break from it. Today you can experience the shift…

Today’s Mission: Take the First Step…it will always be the scariest step. However, after you take that first step you will discover courage, purpose, and strength. These are the necessary tools for success and truly living a life of abundance!

Awakening to Intuition

“If prayer is you talking to God, then intuition is God talking to you.” –Dr. Wayne Dyer

Did You Hear That?

Have you ever been alone thinking about something and you begin to hear a voice speaking to you? Don’t worry, I am not trying to re-create a scene from Paranormal Activity or Ghostly Encounters *smile*. There have been many times when I am pondering over making an important decision and I can hear a voice guiding me on what to do. For those of you that don’t know I am a Christian and I firmly believe in the Holy Spirit. As a child, I was afraid of the Holy Spirit because I thought it was a ghost that told you what to do or possessed you. As I matured in my knowledge of self and spirituality, I have come to the conclusion that the Holy Spirit (for me) is intuition, insight, inspiration, and motivation. Think of it as God’s “tutor” for us, if you may. If you are a Christian then you believe that he created us all with free will. So that means that he can not FORCE us to do what is right in his eyes…right? But through the Spirit, he can make our hairs stand up when something isn’t right, or give us an uneasy feeling when we are about to make a bad decision, etc. We DO NOT have to listen to our “tutor” , but if we do it will awaken us to the infinite possibilities of life and our potential.

When You Know, You Know…

I challenge everyone reading this post to be still and become aware of your spirit. Listen to your inner voice. We are the only species on earth that can SEE and HEAR our thoughts. Once you know, that you know, you are now embarking on a journey of self-discovery and total life fulfillment.

Do You Complain or Contribute

“As individuals, people are inherently good. I have a somewhat more pessimistic view of people in groups. And I remain extremely concerned when I see what’s happening in our country, which is in many ways the luckiest place in the world. We don’t seem to be excited about making our country a better place for our kids.”

Steve Jobs

I have been in many group discussions over the past couple of months concerning teenagers. Everyone has an opinion but no one has a solution. We are so quick to point out what is wrong with this new generation but never ask them how can we help. They are our future and until we show compassion and concern towards them they will continue to think and act as if we don’t care.

The Magic of a Team

“Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.”

~Henry Ford~

My adrenaline is still racing after a phenomenal conference call with all of team members and business partners! We are not a new team but we are definitely resilient!! Over the past two years, I have seen some team members (including myself) go through relationship issues, financial strain, and various other life altering scenarios. Some have even quit. However, it is so inspiring to see those that have not given up inspire others to persevere. We have gone through, and will continue to go through, peaks and valleys in our business. But what matters most is that we stay together and work together so that all of us can share success TOGETHER!

Are You The Leader Who Serves?

Q: Who makes a great leader?

A: An outstanding servant.

I have been listening to and reading many books on leadership and the characteristics of a great leader. I wasn’t too thrilled by many of the criteria or styles of leadership, so I grabbed the bible and I started reading The Book of Mark, Chapter 9, Verse 35:

³⁵ Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all.” (NIV)

As I read this passage I began to think of all of the leaders that a exponential impact on the sake of mankind: Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., John F. Kennedy, Nelson Mandela, and of course, Mother Theresa.

Mother Theresa is the quintessential example of a true Servant Leader. She dedicated her life to serve others in any way that she could at a very young age. She formed various missionaries and initiatives to bring peace and provide necessities to those who were destitute and lacking hope. Her submission of her self to God and the will of the people inspired and compelled others to follow her. As a result she became the figurehead of missionaries and her legacy of service lives on and is carried out by those who were touched by her example.

It is now clear to me that before one becomes a dynamic leader, they must first be a humble servant. It is through selfless dedication to serve that stimulates others to do the same.